Five days from today I have to get up in front a shitload of people and perform a wedding ceremony. How did this happen? How did I become an ordained minister?

Okay, I know how. I filled out a form…

Can someone please tell me why I’m addicted to the show The Rock of Love? I blame Eden. She turned me on to this one and now I CAN’T STOP…

I’m over at Naughty and Spice today.

I also wanted to let you know I’m going to be really busy over the next week or so, so my blog won’t be updated as much as I like, and I’ll be…

Most of you know I have a big ol’ tattoo across my back and, because I favor trashy wife-beaters, it’s usually exposed. The only time it’s covered up is when I wear a long sleeved, button up shirt and that…

First of all I got to call in to the Playboy station and talk to Eden Bradley on air. If that wasn’t exciting enough, I got to go to a brothel Saturday night. It was the grand reopening of The…

Did you know that I’m a minister? I know! But it’s true. I’m registered with the Universal Life Church and I can legally perform marriages and exorcisms. Hopefully I’ll never have to do so during the same ceremony. Although you…

So today I went to the grocery store and I kept scanning people for name badges. How strange is that? I’m still in conference mode, obviously. I was thinking things like, “those shoes are awful!” and “wonder what she writes”…